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#4668 | | The Phone Booth Rule: A lone dime always gets the number nearly right.
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#4669 | | The qotc (quote of the con) was Liz's: "My brain is paged out to my liver."
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#4670 | | The real man's Bloody Mary: Ingredients: vodka, tomato juice, Tobasco, Worcestershire sauce, A-1 steak sauce, ice, salt, pepper, celery.
Fill a large tumbler with vodka. Throw all the other ingredients away.
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#4671 | | The Roman Rule: The one who says it cannot be done should never interrupt the one who is doing it.
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#4672 | | The rules: (1) Thou shalt not worship other computer systems. (2) Thou shalt not impersonate Liberace or eat watermelon while sitting at the console keyboard. (3) Thou shalt not slap users on the face, nor staple their silly little card decks together. (4) Thou shalt not get physically involved with the computer system, especially if you're already married. (5) Thou shalt not use magnetic tapes as frisbees, nor use a disk pack as a stool to reach another disk pack. (6) Thou shalt not stare at the blinking lights for more than one eight hour shift. (7) Thou shalt not tell users that you accidentally destroyed their files/backup just to see the look on their little faces. (8) Thou shalt not enjoy cancelling a job. (9) Thou shalt not display firearms in the computer room. (10) Thou shalt not push buttons "just to see what happens".
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#4673 | | The Second Law of Thermodynamics: If you think things are in a mess now, just wait! -- Jim Warner
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#4674 | | The Seventh Commandments for Technicians: Work thou not on energized equipment, for if thou dost, thy fellow workers will surely buy beers for thy widow and console her in other ways.
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#4675 | | The Sixth Commandment of Frisbee: The greatest single aid to distance is for the disc to be going in a direction you did not want. (Goes the wrong way = Goes a long way.) -- Dan Roddick
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#4676 | | The Third Law of Photography: If you did manage to get any good shots, they will be ruined when someone inadvertently opens the darkroom door and all of the dark leaks out.
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#4677 | | The three biggest software lies: (1) *Of course* we'll give you a copy of the source. (2) *Of course* the third party vendor we bought that from will fix the microcode. (3) Beta test site? No, *of course* you're not a beta test site.
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