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BGA fortune cookies :: definitions
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#3838checkuary, n:
The thirteenth month of the year. Begins New Year's Day and ends
when a person stops absentmindedly writing the old year on his checks.
#3839Chef, n.:
Any cook who swears in French.
#3840Cheit's Lament:
If you help a friend in need, he is sure to remember you--
the next time he's in need.
#3841Chemicals, n.:
Noxious substances from which modern foods are made.
#3842Cheops' Law:
Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.
#3843Chicago Transit Authority Rider's Rule #36:
Never ever ask the tough looking gentleman wearing El Rukn headgear
where he got his "pyramid powered pizza warmer".
-- Chicago Reader 3/27/81
#3844Chicago Transit Authority Rider's Rule #84:
The CTA has complimentary pop-up timers available on request
for overheated passengers. When your timer pops up, the driver will
cheerfully baste you.
-- Chicago Reader 5/28/82
#3845Chicken Soup:
An ancient miracle drug containing equal parts of aureomycin,
cocaine, interferon, and TLC. The only ailment chicken soup
can't cure is neurotic dependence on one's mother.
-- Arthur Naiman, "Every Goy's Guide to Yiddish"
#3846Chism's Law of Completion:
The amount of time required to complete a government project is
precisely equal to the length of time already spent on it.
#3847Chisolm's First Corollary to Murphy's Second Law:
When things just can't possibly get any worse, they will.
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