fortune index all fortunes
| #6253 | | Fortune's Real-Life Courtroom Quote #7:
Q: What happened then? A: He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can identify me." Q: Did he kill you? A: No.
| | #6254 | | Frankfort, Kentucky, makes it against the law to shoot off a policeman's tie.
| | #6255 | | "Gentlemen of the jury," said the defense attorney, now beginning to warm to his summation, "the real question here before you is, shall this beautiful young woman be forced to languish away her loveliest years in a dark prison cell? Or shall she be set free to return to her cozy little apartment at 4134 Mountain Ave. -- there to spend her lonely, loveless hours in her boudoir, lying beside her little Princess phone, 962-7873?"
| | #6256 | | Getting kicked out of the American Bar Association is liked getting kicked out of the Book-of-the-Month Club. -- Melvin Belli on the occcasion of his getting kicked out of the American Bar Association
| | #6257 | | God decided to take the devil to court and settle their differences once and for all. When Satan heard of this, he grinned and said, "And just where do you think you're going to find a lawyer?"
| | #6258 | | Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore, is the method of choosing leaders. -- Frank Herbert, "Children of Dune"
| | #6259 | | He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides.
| | #6260 | | "Hi, I'm Preston A. Mantis, president of Consumers Retail Law Outlet. As you can see by my suit and the fact that I have all these books of equal height on the shelves behind me, I am a trained legal attorney. Do you have a car or a job? Do you ever walk around? If so, you probably have the makings of an excellent legal case. Although of course every case is different, I would definitely say that based on my experience and training, there's no reason why you shouldn't come out of this thing with at least a cabin cruiser.
"Remember, at the Preston A. Mantis Consumers Retail Law Outlet, our motto is: 'It is very difficult to disprove certain kinds of pain.'" -- Dave Barry, "Pain and Suffering"
| | #6261 | | Horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants in Marshalltown, Iowa.
| | #6262 | | How do you insult a lawyer? You might as well not even try. Consider: of all the highly trained and educated professions, law is the only one in which the prime lesson is that *winning* is more important than *truth*. Once someone has sunk to that level, what worse can you say about them?
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