fortune index all fortunes
| #10051 | | Workers of the world, arise! You have nothing to lose but your chairs.
| | #10052 | | World tensions have, if anything, increased in the quarter century since H.G. Wells uttered his glum warning: "There is no more evil thing on earth than race prejudice, none at all. I write deliberately -- it is the worst single thing in life now. It justifies and holds together more baseness, cruelty and abomination than any other sort of error in the world." -- Sydney Harris
| | #10053 | | World War Three can be averted by adherence to a strictly enforced dress code!
| | #10054 | | "Wrong," said Renner. "The tactful way," Rod said quietly, "the polite way to disagree with the Senator would be to say, `That turns out not to be the case.'"
| | #10055 | | You can have peace. Or you can have freedom. Don't ever count on having both at once. -- Lazarus Long
| | #10056 | | You first have to decide whether to use the short or the long form. The short form is what the Internal Revenue Service calls "simplified", which means it is designed for people who need the help of a Sears tax-preparation expert to distinguish between their first and last names. Here's the complete text:
"(1) How much did you make? (AMOUNT) (2) How much did we here at the government take out? (AMOUNT) (3) Hey! Sounds like we took too much! So we're going to send an official government check for (ONE-FIFTEENTH OF THE AMOUNT WE TOOK) directly to the (YOUR LAST NAME) household at (YOUR ADDRESS), for you to spend in any way you please! Which just goes to show you, (YOUR FIRST NAME), that it pays to file the short form!"
The IRS wants you to use this form because it gets to keep most of your money. So unless you have pond silt for brains, you want the long form. -- Dave Barry, "Sweating Out Taxes"
| | #10057 | | You have all the characteristics of a popular politician: a horrible voice, bad breeding, and a vulgar manner. -- Aristophanes
| | #10058 | | You must include all income you receive in the form of money, property and services if it is not specifically exempt. Report property (goods) and services at their fair market values. Examples include income from bartering or swapping transactions, side commissions, kickbacks, rent paid in services, illegal activities (such as stealing, drugs, etc.), cash skimming by proprietors and tradesmen, "moonlighting" services, gambling, prizes and awards. Not reporting such income can lead to prosecution for perjury and fraud. -- Excerpt from Taxachussetts income tax forms
| | #10059 | | You roll my log, and I will roll yours. -- Lucius Annaeus Seneca
| | #10060 | | You should never wear your best trousers when you go out to fight for freedom and liberty. -- Henrik Ibsen
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