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#3011 | | "Been through Hell? Whaddya bring back for me?" -- A. Brilliant
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#3012 | | "I don't know what their gripe is. A critic is simply someone paid to render opinions glibly." "Critics are grinks and groinks." -- Baron and Badger, from Badger comics
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#3013 | | "I've got some amyls. We could either party later or, like, start his heart." -- "Cheech and Chong's Next Movie"
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#3014 | | "Israel today announced that it is giving up. The Zionist state will dissolve in two weeks time, and its citizens will disperse to various resort communities around the world. Said Prime Minister Yitzhak Shamir, 'Who needs the aggravation?'" -- Dennis Miller, "Satuday Night Live" News
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#3015 | | "And, of course, you have the commercials where savvy businesspeople Get Ahead by using their MacIntosh computers to create the ultimate American business product: a really sharp-looking report." -- Dave Barry
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#3016 | | SHOP OR DIE, people of Earth! [offer void where prohibited] -- Capitalists from outer space, from Justice League Int'l comics
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#3017 | | "Roman Polanski makes his own blood. He's smart -- that's why his movies work." -- A brilliant director at "Frank's Place"
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#3018 | | "The following is not for the weak of heart or Fundamentalists." -- Dave Barry
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#3019 | | "I take Him shopping with me. I say, 'OK, Jesus, help me find a bargain'" --Tammy Faye Bakker
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#3020 | | Gary Hart: living proof that you *can* screw your brains out.
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